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“Wow. Want to feel uncomfortable?” –Susan

This would be a really fun one to go see as a work event.
The movie is pretty predictable; it’s in the style of a PBS history documentary like that Civil War one that was so popular. But of course, it has to be broadcast on the BBC.. er… BBS… because that’s the only way you can get American history straight. It has commercials which really help keep it from boring you — just like a real documentary about history. It’s funny in a way. In a dry, dark, ironic sort of way.
What’s great about this movie is how far it takes it. It uses an outline of actual world history to rewrite the past. I do recommend seeing this movie - not because it’s a great movie, it’s not stunning, but because when I came out of the movie, I didn’t feel optimistic nor pessimistic. The story suggests that freedom and tolerance is the natural state, which leaves you feeling hopeful. It also points out how hard mankind fights against the natural state and how far from the natural state we can stretch. I couldn’t help but drawing parallels with the Bush campaign, which left me feeling again like we are living a time of shame and ignorance that future generations will pity us for. The other powerful message is the link between religion and the ability to convince good people to do very bad things. For every atrocity, there is a quote in the bible that buttresses it to stand against all reason. If nothing else, it’s fun to see what the writers do with various historical characters in this alternate universe.

In conclusion, O Canada! Our home and native land! True patriot love in all thy sons command. With glowing hearts we see thee rise, The True North strong and free! From far and wide, O Canada, we stand on guard for thee. God keep our land glorious and free! O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

I’m getting behind on my book reviews (I’m now two books past this one), so I’d better start cranking them out!

My Sister’s Keeper explores an intriguing medical/legal ethical delimma through the story of a family unraveling at the seams. Here is the cast of characters:

Kate; older sister: as a toddler was diagnosed with a fatal and rare form of leukemia.
Anna; younger sister: was conceived with the specific intention of being an exact blood match for Kate and to extend Kate’s life via cord blood and bone marrow transplants.
Sara; mother: a former lawyer whose current life is consumed with caring for Kate
Brian; father: fireman.
Jesse; brother and oldest of the siblings: parents gave up on him long ago, and he spends his time setting fires, being dysfunctional and getting into trouble.
Campbell: laywer acting on Anna’s behalf. A classic, stereotypical jerk type… or IS he?…
Julia: the guardian appointed to see to Anna’s welfare and speak on her behalf. Oh yeah, and a former passionate love of Campbell’s.

Ok, so the basic premise is that Anna gets sick and tired of only living to be a human guinea pig for her sister’s medical needs, so she sues her family to try and get medical emancipation. Her mother, the ex-lawyer, insists on being the lawyer on the other side of the case, so there are all these direct obvious family tensions involved, with Anna’s mother saying “how can you just let your sister DIE?!”, and her dad saying “Maybe Anna’s right; maybe we should let her make her own decisions” and her brother not saying anything because he’s off becoming a delinquent… Meanwhile Campbell and Julia are dealing with the case, but also with their past, as they suddenly are forced to work together after many many years of separation since their college love affair, which ended suddenly and painfully. Oh, and there’s a service dog named Judge in the mix as well who may or may not be a real service dog.

The issues raised in the novel are fascinating, and for the most part the family story is engaging and well-written. I didn’t buy the Jesse character–he just seemed too MUCH…too much of the stereotypical angsty teen boy. His character felt a little contrived to me. Also, the love story between Campbell and Julia seemed unrealistic and completely unnecessary. I felt it was added in there just so there could be a love story. It’s been like 15 freakin’ years, and these two 1) have never run into each other even though they live and work in similar professions in the same city, and 2) haven’t gotten the hell over each other??

This is an easy-to-read novel–a quick read, despite it’s 400+ pages–and for the most part the shifting narrative voice is quite effective. There are some interesting surprises in the story as well–in one particular case, the surprise itself felt a tad contrived (although I didn’t expect it), BUT… there is this one tiny little trick early on in the novel that is just so satisfyingly clever, I completely forgave the contrivedness of the later surprise. That one tiny literary trick probably gave me more delight than the entire rest of the book.

So, in summary. It’s a good book–not a GREAT book–about a really interesting topic. It’s not an intellectual book, which may be a good or bad thing, depending on your perspective. I’d recommend it; but I wouldn’t say “oh my god, you REALLY should read this novel!!”. Final grade: a nice, solid B.

“A study in adorablenessosity” –Susan

This movie is like watching a baby farting. If you’re just watching, it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen, but if you close your eyes it’s just weird–at times funny and at times unpleasant. There are a lot of great Will Ferrell soundbites you could pull from this movie, but the humor would be in taking them out of context; unlike most animated features today, there is no adult-oriented humor in this film. I don’t remember exact quotes, but Will Ferrell says things similar to “oh no! I’ve got to save my monkey!” and “I’m sorry I’ve let you down. I promised you something 40 feet tall and awe-inspiring, and all I have to show for the effort is this little troublesome monkey.” Although Will Ferrell’s performance is tame and in keeping with the movie, I can’t help but be somewhat amused just by his vocal intonations and picturing him saying these things. The other outstanding talent in this film is David Cross who voices the villain. He has an advantage in the writing as his lines are edgier, but it’s more than that. David Cross is trying to make his character entertaining for me (the viewer drawn to the film by the cast and an addiction to VH1 “I love the…” shows) and for the few short scenes he is in, he succeeds.

The monkey is like babies and kittens and puppies all rolled up together and served on an ice cream cone. I have never seen anything cuter. It was a little bit distracting though, knowing what I know about monkeys. I was concerned that he was a wild animal and that the man in the yellow hat wasn’t taking the situation seriously. George had several opportunities to bite the man in the yellow hat, and he could have contracted AIDS, ebola, rabies, 12th monkey disease, or any number of horrible ailments from the wild jungles of Africa. I think it’s a bad message to send children that monkeys make good playmates. There should be a disclaimer that warns children “do not try this at home. Monkeys are filthy feces-throwing masturbators and balloons are not a safe method of transportation.”

The movie soundtrack, which I’m sure is topping soccer mom countdowns around the world, is a collection of the most adorable, precious music I’ve ever heard. The whole experience of this movie is like being wrapped in a baby afghan crocheted out of pink clouds… which is why I recommend watching with your eyes closed. Don’t forget that the rest of the audience in the theater is four though. Their mothers may not appreciate you reclining in your seat laughing and saying “he said naughty monkey! AGAIN!”

During this year’s Super Bowl Gillette effectively announced “Fuck Everything, We’re Doing Five Blades“. I feel that whenever The Onion unintentionally steps into Miss Cleo’s shoes one must stand up and pay attention (for the best example of this see Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over).

Yesterday, my razor grown dull, I found myself in staring at the gigantic orange display for the latest and greatest razor at the local Fred Meyer’s. At $7.99 for a new razor, two cartridges, and some sensitive skin shaving gel it was difficult to pass up on the new Gillette Fusion, refills for the Mach3 or Mach3 Turbo usually run about the same amount and don’t come with a free can of shaving cream. I resolved to at least try the thing, and as soon as I got home from the store I took the new Fusion for a test drive.

Things I liked:

• The sixth blade on the back was actually really handy. Trying to shave in little tight places with a cartridge as monsterously large as the Fusion’s is a pain.
• I didn’t have any razor burn, but I rarely do with new fresh razors

Things I disliked:

• The cartridge is really fucking big. Huge. I suppose this means it’s cutting things faster, but I didn’t really get that impression
• The blades are closer together. According to the commercial this is a good thing, according to the side of my sink, not so much. With the blades closer together it seemed to get clogged faster. If I wasn’t lazy and shaved every day this wouldn’t really be an issue
• It doesn’t seem to give any closer of a shave than the Mach3. I’ve got definite stubble 24 hours later. I can’t tell for certain, but it might have actually given me a worse shave.

The ideal razor for me would probably be a modified Mach3, where the blades are ever so slightly closer together (but not as close as the Fusion), utilizing the old school single moisture strip, and a magical fourth blade on the back.

Gillette: make it so.

My guess is that when the two cartridges run out I’ll probably go back to the old standby of the Mach3. Although I’ll definitely give the Fusion the full run of both cartridges, just to make sure I like it less.

Replete with his signature/overplayed/ “This is your life…”isms and repetition of sentences for the sake of repetition of sentences, Diary is Chuck Palahniuk’s sixth novel.

This is Chuck making a buck.

Having read only Fight Club, Fugitives and Refugees, and now Diary I’m probably a bit too fresh to his writing to be jaded, or not. Based on those two novels and guidebook I’d say he’s a four trick pony.

This is Chuck’s pending screen play.

Even though the novel is written essentially in the first person I’ve never felt less about a character. Ever. I’ve felt more of a connection to the little kids in the short stories in back issues of HighLights.

This is the end of my Aliens review, which unlike the end of this novel is not a cop-out: I urge you to read something else.